My  family

I wonder what they see when they glance our way —

a family arranged just so,

smiles smoothed to civility,

no storms, no shouting,

just that tautmouthed shimmer of distance

only we can feel.

Once, you were warm against my skin —

born of me, fed by me,

your small hands anchoring my whole world.

Now I stand an occasional visitor in your lives,

watching you offer your children

the tenderness I once gave to you.

Somewhere between your growing up

and my stepping out into my own life,

the thread slipped.

And though I reach for it still,

we move like polite halfstrangers,

orbiting a love we can no longer name.

So  I stand here —

not accusing, not demanding —

just holding the echo of what we were:

softedged memories of small bodies curled into mine,

and the tears only I could quell,

You grew, as children must,

stretching beyond the borders of the life I built around you.

And I grew too —

into someone who wanted more

than the narrow script I’d been handed.

Perhaps that was the first fracture,

or perhaps it was simply time

doing what time always does.

Loss is a quiet thief.

It doesn’t slam doors;

it just forgets to open them.

And now I watch you

from the doorway of your own bright, bustling worlds,

proud and strangely peripheral,

as if I slipped out of the frame

while no one was looking.

Is that what they see when they glance our way

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